Keep Believing

In light of recent events, it's hard to believe there's still goodness and love in the world. With senseless violence and hatred circling around, I'll admit I started to lose hope in the future. But last night I was reminded that miraculous beauty still exists, and that in and of itself should be enough to keep even the smallest sliver of hope alive.

I spent hours at Island Beach State Park with Jackie and Nick staring at the unbelievable sights that hadn't been ruined by mankind yet. Although unsuccessful in fishing (with the exception of Jackie's little munchkin fish--good job Jackie!), the night was nothing short of perfection.

When the sun went down, we laid on the blanket staring up at the stars. Untouched by polluted city lights, the stars blanketed the sky in a way that I haven't seen in a very long time. And as Jackie and Nick searched for constellations and passing satellites, I tried to adjust my awful eyesight in order to do the same--and when I was able to see what they were seeing, it was wonderful.

Although violence and hatred are prominent in this world, and will never go away, there are so many things that lead me to believe that it can get better. A world with places as spectacular as this can't be that bad. And although Heaven exists in the clouds, having a fraction of it on earth is all I need to keep believing.

I'm trying to change the world, leave me be.

Many adults have asked me lately what I plan to do after Americorps (even though I haven't even started yet), and my answer is usually "apply to the Peace corps." Nine times out of ten, this answer does not please them, and yesterday I was told that I need to start looking for a job after I get done in New Orleans so I can start making money. My question is: why?

As beautiful as this world is, it still needs a lot of work. And in order to change that, people need to devote their time. I know I've always wanted to change the world, and now that I have the opportunity to do so, I'm tired of people telling me I need to get a job. If I don't care about the income, why should you?

I've always been sure of four things: I will travel the world, I will write, I won't make a lot of money, and I will change lives. Now, how am I supposed to do any of those things sitting at a 9-to-5 job? It's not in my nature, and I'm exhausted from people telling me that I shouldn't do what I dream of doing. Yes, the places I want to go are dangerous. Yes, there are a lot of risks. But I want the job of changing those places so that they aren't dangerous, and so that the risks decrease.

Someone has to do it. And for years I've wanted it to be me. And now it can be. So leave me be--let me change the world.

The Start of Something Good

When I woke up this morning, within a 25 ft. vicinity I had a comfortable bed, clean/running water, a bathroom, food, electricity, Internet, clothing, photos recapping memories, and a best friend. Many people in this world aren't lucky enough to even have one or two of these things within a 25 mile radius, and I had them in 25 ft.

I was born into this life, but many people are born into a life very different from mine. This is what prompted me to change the world, as much as I can. As most of you know I traveled to Belize and Honduras on service trips, and as much as I absolutely loved both of my weeks in those places, I've always yearned to do something more effective--more long term.

I always knew I wouldn't enter a 9-5 job right after college. Actually, I probably never will be at a 9-5 job, but that's besides the point. If you asked me a few years back, I would have told you my plan was to enter the Peace Corps directly out of college. And yes, that is still one of my dreams, but I can't commit to a 2 1/2 year project right now--it scares me. So after racking my brain a bit, I decided to look into Americorps. It was pretty much everything I wanted out of the Peace Corps, except in the good ol' US of A. And although everyone that knows me knows I want to live in a third world country, I figured I could start off slow instead of dive right in.

When I applied for Americorps I originally wanted Nashville. And during my initial interview, Brian asked me if I would consider other sites, and I blurted out New Orleans. I have no idea where that thought came from--I had never even considered New Orleans. But I'm happy I blurted it out. A few days later I had an interview with Unity of Greater New Orleans. And a few days after that, I had my third interview, and was offered a job on the spot.

I am unbelievably ecstatic about the next chapter of my life. I never thought I'd be moving to NO,LA, but fate acts in mysterious ways. I know God is guiding me there for a reason, and am extremely hopeful.

And don't worry all of you that know me as a third-world-loving philanthropist. That's still me. One day I'll get there.